Thursday 19 March 2020

Well then


I hope I find you all well in these troubled times. Things here are no doubt much as they are everywhere else. We are slightly shell-shocked from it all to be honest. The biggest boy was working hard, ready for his GCSEs in eight weeks' time, and then suddenly cut adrift. I am so disappointed for him. Not only will he not have the chance to take his exams, but all of the other rites of passage have gone too. The last day of school before study leave, the leavers' assembly, saying goodbye, the scary weeks of exams and revision and more exams and more revision, the hard work, the sweat, the tears, the really earning something, then the exhilaration of it being all over and the sudden hard-won freedom, the prom and the endless weeks of summer. And finally, that envelope, after doing his best and trying his hardest.

I feel very sorry for all of the GCSE students and even more so for the A-level students who are no doubt also worried about their university places. I think it will take us a few days to adjust. Apart from anything else, life has suddenly become rather empty for him and his friends. Days have gone from a rush of school, gym, revision, football training and matches and cricket practice, with every spare moment used, to wondering what to do all day. He did some chemistry today, I think the study habit has become ingrained. But I do also know that we are so very lucky in everything we have and that this is just a bump in the road. Onwards and all that.

The school has closed already, so the house is full and the dog is wondering what is going on. There are a lot more opportunities for naps when everyone is at school.

I am rather struggling to come up with other things to say today. I am limiting myself to reading just a few headlines every day, and having heard some of the ludicrous stories doing the rounds I think it's a wise move. But still, it is tending to fill my thoughts, as it no doubt is for everyone else.

I did read somewhere today that reading for just six minutes a day reduces stress by 68 percent, so I am taking that on board. And wondering if I read for 8.82 minutes whether 100 percent of stress will be gone. That must be right, no?

Look after yourselves my lovelies, and stroke a dog if you can find one. xx

24 comments:

  1. Stroking my furry cat as I type, one handed of course. Middle teacher son is finding it all rather alarming too. He’s meant to be in school next week teaching year 11’s but now no exams, all rather peculiar. Thinking of your boys. Hang on in there, it may be a bumpy ride. B x

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  2. Oh I do feel for your son and all the other children who were due to have important exams. I'm sure some will be celebrating that they don't have to sit them, but if you've put in all the work it must be so disappointing. Interesting fact about the reading - I wonder if it counts if you listen to Audible?! I only tend to read in bed and then I'm so tired that I doubt I manage the necessary 6 minutes before my eyes start to close! I'll make a concerted effort tomorrow. :o) xx

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  3. I have to admit it never crossed my mind all the things that our school kids are missing out on. Sorry for your son. Life can really be unfair at times. My daughter had tickets for her and her daughter to go to a Billie Eilish concert and it was cancelled and she is so bummed out. I think a lot of us are befuddled by all the dire news, death and constant news.. I appreciate the idea for reading. I'm into a new book that I'm really liking, "The Lavender Garden" by Lucinda Riley.. I think I will turn off CNN and read. Sending good wishes your way. ((hugs)), Teresa :-)

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  4. We are still open, to 7,8 and 10 yesterday and today. As from Monday I dont know what will happen. We had lots of year 11's coming in yesterday as they needed comfort, they are shell shocked. Has your secondary closed completely, which one is it please? KLB are still open indefinitely...

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  5. DEar CJ
    We are all in the same boat and I soooooo feel with you. I'm so confused, we all are. It will take time to adjust. This thing with schools shutting down is necessary but it pains me to see my children falling victims to this crises. School is something we take for granted here in the west, it is just provided, it has always been. When my kids have had their teen tantrums of "Why do we need to go to school and learn this stupid stuff?" I've always told them they are lucky to have school and shouldn't complain. Now the melody is different at home. Now they cry because they WANT to go to school. They miss it. It is such a big part of their world, their job, their future. Not easy. Not fair. But what else can we do to try and calm this beast running amok worldwide?

    I don't sleep well, try to keep a brave face but inside i carry lots of stress and worries. Today I'm gonna try meditation. Reading is a good advice. I just started a new Swedish novel. I would love to read something beautiful and romantic but it is actually a crime story. Maybe I can order something online that is more cheerful and uplifting? Crochet helps loads. Once again it becomes my escape as my brain shuts off everything when I focus on doing just one stitch at a time. I've been thinking to start a project to share on my blog, for those out there who might retreat into blog world and sits alone. Maybe we can crochet something together, row by row or square by square... I feel like reaching out and help. Not sure how, I'll figure it out.
    You'll find you're new normal eventually, or not. We'll get through this because we have to. Hug your kids, stroke the dog, read 10 minutes a day and you will have extra stress in the bank. Spend time in the garden, write on your novel and take care of yourself. Blog. I think we all will start coming together again online. I'm looking forward to that.
    Lots of love
    Annette

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  6. What a disappointment for him after all the hard work but no doubt there will be more exams next year and the following year and driving tests, every August another set of results so perhaps this year's disappointment won't seem so bad in time. Take care.

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  7. Annie is also at a loss just now (she is doing Highers, the Scottish A level equivalent). She's had assessments all week to capture at least some of the progress the children have made in their courses and she did really well in her prelim exams so that's a good start. We did have a chat about all the missed rites of passage and I do feel sorry she can't party with her friends, or just go out and hang-out. I think this will hit her hard, she is a social animal. Alistair meanwhile is up in the Highlands with his P7 year, blissfully unaware that schools are closing today. He'll be delighted. Our schools are open for vulnerable children and children whose parents work at the frontline. All school children in Glasgow have also been issued with iPads and setup with Microsoft Teams to connect with school and get tasks to complete. I bemoaned those iPads for months, saying that resources better be spend on vulnerable children and social care but I suppose I'll be glad they have them now. We are receiving a home study pack today for the youngest (it includes a pencil).

    We are a pragmatic lot and take a day at the time. Annie has promoted herself to homeschool general in charge so Richard and I will be able to work. For me nothing changes at work, I have been a fully online lecturer for years and all our online courses are running as scheduled. I have upgraded my audiobook subscription so I don't have to read the news or read tedious self isolation diaries and well meant (but time and resource intensive) suggestions on how to keep your children happy and well educated. Mine will be spending quite some time watching the telly and weeding the garden.

    I hope you find a good way to relax and time to continue your freelance writing, and of course to write on your book xx

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  8. Spending too much time with the news....or any form of media right now, is a dire option, I think. I know there are the feel-good stories out there, but they seem less important (to those reporting). It's like watching a slow motion car wreck.

    We homeschool already...well, unschool, actually, so nothing has changed on that front. But I do feel for your son and all of those milestones that will be either postponed or missed....we don't have those kinds of exams here but I read enough British blogs to know that they're a Very Big Thing.

    I know I'm wincing at the sudden upsurge of "use your time wisely" advice that's coming down the internet pipeline...so now we have to "take advantage of the crisis" and learn oil painting, pottery and the cello, all while reading aloud to the children and making blanket forts. Ugh. Have we not learned?

    I think Bertie has the right idea....take lots of naps and walks - repeat as necessary.

    love to you and yours...xoxox

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  9. Dear CJ, I was so pleased to see a post from you today, and to tell you the truth it didn't really matter what you wrote, I was just thankful to hear from you. I have the feeling that this online contact with like-minded friends will become more and more important in the weeks to come, when we have to see less of folk in person, but still want to know how others are feeling and coping. Don't feel you have to be particularly entertaining or sparklingly witty - just turn up and (virtually) breathe. That'll be enough for me !

    My own dogs are thrilled skinny to have me more or less permanently at home to attend to their every whim, and having the whole pack eyeball to eyeball every minute of every day. But last night, going to bed feeling stressed and apprehensive about the way things are going, and feeling powerless to do much about it, I have to secretly admit to being comforted by the serial plodding upstairs, to creep onto my bed, by six sets of furry feet. All of us nested together - some of us snoring - filling every curve and hollow with warmth and gay abandon. Well, I guess I felt that I was not actually alone, that the most important things were still there, and in fine fettle, and that while we are all together and well, that's all you can really ask of life right now.

    I'm even thinking that this might also serve as a bit of a wake up call, to societies who've got used to having everything on tap, whatever the season, whatever the unseen costs, as we've sleep-walked into thinking that having so much means it'll always be there, whether its the humble toilet roll on the supermarket shelves, or strawberries in December. Nappy sacks, and baked beans.

    And as for the disruption to schooling, its a terrible shame for those who've worked hard, and had their goals in sight, only to have them wink out in an instant, like the skies suddenly emptying of stars. Who knew this would happen ? But maybe we'll take things less for granted in the future, now we're finding out what it means to have to go without, seeing things disappearing. At least its affecting everyone, great and small, and its an even playing field, in a way. Somehow we'll find a way to pick up where we left off, even if it does mean re-hashing term times, when exams are sat, and new college and university intakes. And finally catching up, and getting to where we're meant to be will be all the sweeter for it. It will.

    Now's a time to batten down the hatches, take the best care of those we love most, and anyone else we can help out. To keep an eye out for little things that make a day feel better: a bit of sunshine - a good drying day for washing. The first signs of spring ignoring all the doom and gloom - anything that floats your particular boat. And this time will pass, as all time passes, and kids will be driving themselves,and us, mad again, with revision and approaching exams, unwashed P.E. kit, and all the other everyday scrummage that we're missing right now. It won't last for ever.

    Stay well everybody and keep your chins up. And stay in touch where you can, how you can. Me, I'm off to check my fabric stash, and peg out a bit more on the line. Laters !

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  10. We had to close the museum I work in this week. It's very strange and surreal to be here with no volunteers coming to and fro to chat. On the plus side, I've finally managed to get the better of my emails!

    Am very worried about loved ones (and this weird role-reversal where I've effectively grounded my parents!) but I have stockpiled on books and wool, and that allotment still needs digging...

    Keep well everyone.

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  11. Good picture of Bertie. I sympathize with all affected like your sons are. I only skim the news once or twice daily at present. Thankfully I'm able to keep on plotting which keeps me occupied physically and mentally for much of the day. Thanks, and you too. I always do. xx

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  12. Your maths seem right so that must be correct! Also no dog to hand, so will a cat do? Seriously though, these are very strange and unsettling times. Sending very best wishes to you and your family, CJ from over here in the Fens x

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  13. So sorry for your son CJ, this is just horrible for everyone. I can't seem to settle my mind, I can't knit or crochet, I just clean and organize, which isn't a bad thing but it isn't helping me to relax any. So much stress and worry, but for now we are all in good health and we have food inthe cupboard, that is something.

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  14. So sorry for your boy CJ. Stay safe and enjoy your cute doggy.
    Jacquie x

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  15. Ahhhh, so sorry about the biggest boy. We'll all come through it hopefully and learn other ways ofdoing things. Still a massive shock though. Higs.xxxx

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  16. I am really sorry to hear this CJ. My heart goes out to all the children who are at the stage in their school life that this will have the biggest effect. It is the suddenness of it all that makes it harder to comprehend especially for those children for whom the news and the wider world is not part of their lives just yet. I do hope that you all find a way to get through this together and come out the other side all the stronger for it.

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  17. It must be so hard for all the young people hit by this. I remind myself that mostly we are fortunate and we have our home and garden and a dog to walk... I didn’t see a soul when I went out to walk this morning. Slightly concerned that our food supplies are getting a bit low and I need to shop soon. I think it will be like an episode of ready steady cook, making meals from whatever we can get hold of. Trying to limit what news I read though as it’s so hard to sift what’s real or not and it raises anxiety levels unnecessarily. I hope you and the family stay well and sane!

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  18. Life at the moment it feels like a film or a nightmare, hard to believe it is for real and everything is moving so fast. I'm so sorry that one of your sons has been affected sad badly with not taking his exams. We can always remember our last few months at school, his memories will be so different. Take care and stay safe. Sarah x

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  19. It is certainly very strange and worrying times. I suppose some students will be rubbing their hands in goes at the thought of no exams. Let’s just ho-e that some of the more irresponsible people come to their senses.

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  20. Patch is getting plenty of pats as he's suddenly become an inside dog and we're not quite sure how that happened. He quietly keeps his eyes closed at bedtime in the hope that if he can't see us, we can't see him and we'll forget he's there. It seems to be working! All topsy-turvy here too but we're rolling along rather pleasantly I must say and for that I know we are very blessed. Stay safe and wash your hands :) xx Susan

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  21. We are in the same boat, with both GCSE and A levels cancelled for my two, and all the loss that comes with not getting to let go gently. The Abruptness has been so hard!
    My eldest really needs his grades in order to move on, and he is worried I think - he was hoping to pull it out the bag for his final exams, but now wont have the chance. Ah well, we are trying not to worry, not a lot to be done other than stay positive and pass the time gently. I am so thankful for our blogging community, Instagram too, it's so comforting to have all these online connections and friendships.xxxxxxxx

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  22. I'm so sorry for your eldest CJ. Like you say the abruptness of it all, and the loss of all those rites of passage. It's too surreal. I hope he's adjusting ok, and you too. Xx

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