I seem to have a photo shortage here at the moment, but I do have homegrown olives. They are small but plentiful. I don't imagine they'll be edible, but the hot weather (I assume) has spurred the olive tree into production. It never looks particularly happy, and I can never work out why. It's on a south-facing patio and I make sure it has plenty of water. Maybe it would rather be dry. But anyway, I have olives.
I know you can't eat them as they are. I bought some from a souk in Morocco once when I was cycling there and tried it, and they made my whole face crumple up. There must be some mysterious alchemy involved in the curing process. If they look fat enough I will do a little research and find out.
In the meantime there is the luxury of summer fruit from the freezer and windfall apples. Crumble anyone?
I am wrestling with a little anxiety at the moment. The vague, unsettling sort. A touch of insomnia, some teeth clenching. All ridiculously unnecessary. I am considering yoga or meditation. Does anyone do these things? Do they work? I'm sure they must, lots of people swear by them. I think it would take a lot of practice to empty my mind. Although of course some would say that my mind is already fairly empty.
I think I shall choose a happy, cosy book next time as well. I am reading Jane Harper's Force of Nature at the moment, which I'm really enjoying, but I read something really unsettling on holiday, and slept really badly. It was a good book, just a bit disturbing. So in the interests of anti-anxiety I shall re-examine my reading pile and remove the less positive stuff for now. Less murder!
I also need to start eating better. I don't have a huge appetite at the moment, and I know I haven't been eating enough veggies. I wonder if the iron tablets are to blame. I just need to get back in kilter, balance it all. Vegetables, healthy reading, a little light meditation. Fortunately the dog makes sure I get some walking in every day. We went down to the river this morning with his whippet friend. It wears him right out, trying to keep up with those long, graceful legs. Which means I can work without interruption for a little longer before he makes me get up and entertain him.
I was feeling a bit peaky this morning, so I laid down for a bit. Despite the whippet running, he took half of the stuffing out of his basket and then licked my face until I got up. There's no peace to be had. Wishing all a good, stress-free weekend. CJ xx
I love the look of your olives! It would be so nice to be able to eat them. I have an olive tree too, in my front yard, but I don't think our olives are edible. They're very tiny and pebble-like, not even appetizing, but I would love to be able to eat my own homegrown olives if it were feasible. I hope you have a good, stress-free weekend too! And maybe an uninterrupted nap. :)
ReplyDeleteYour olives are pretty!
ReplyDeleteI know the feeling of anxiety you are describing; I know it well.
An uneasy feeling. Waiting for something to happen.
I do meditation, and it seems to help.
I will pray for you that it passes quickly, and you will be feeling free soon!
Have a cozy weekend, my friend. : )
I always feel better for a bit of yoga - it's one of those things that I have to force myself to do, but I'm always glad when I make the effort. Are those russet apples? If so, and you have a tree, I'm very jealous - they're my favourite apple. I hope the meditation works. I tried mindfulness once - it worked whilst I was actually doing it, but strangely it seemed to lower my threshold for anxiety. I can remember having to rush out of the library to do some breathing in the car - what's so stressful about choosing books for Heaven's sake?! Enjoy your veggies. xx
ReplyDeleteIt's all about the breathing CJ,most people shallow breathe and we do this without thinking about it .mindfulness means living in the moment and thinking about that moment .I do mindfulness and yoga and you need to do them regulaly to be beneficial ,there are lots of yoga's to and maybe you should begin with Hatha yoga ,the deep breathing will help with your anxiety ,I have 3 daughters (all grown up now with families ) so I know how busy you are but take this time for you it's important ,I'm looking forward to hearing about your yoga experience xx
ReplyDeleteI prescribe listening to some Ram Dass talks - they helped me enormously.
ReplyDeleteThat and indulging in some dark humour with a close friend and a good massage.
Nice post and pictures, although you do seem to be a bit down at present which I hope doesn't last long.
ReplyDeleteThanks, and you too. xx
You have such a great blog-- I was interested by the souk in Morocco reference, I had to look up what a souk was. I signed up about 3 years ago to the fitness centre near me-no matter how bad I feel I come home more restored after a class, whatever it is - stretching, weights, zumba, yoga. I can't say I like going, I force myself to go, but it keeps me more balanced. I'm not a great fitness person, I've never been athletic but I have realised how much of a difference the classes make - perhaps because I focus on something else for a while- I'm not sure. I don't know a lot of people there, but the small exchanges with them when I go to class also help. Jean/Wpg
ReplyDeleteOoh lucky you - Olives! Something we in the frozen north can only dream of growing :-). I've just started yoga and was amazed at how relaxing it was - do give it a try or Tai Chi, which is also amazing for clearing your mind. And it is precious 'me time' too.
ReplyDeleteI don't like olives at all - it's like taking nasty medicine to my taste. I can never manage to clear my mind either or do the trick of picturing yourself on a beach or lying be a stream and dangling your and in the water.
ReplyDeleteYour mantel looks very pretty, it looks like you were sent some pretty roses, lucky! It's the curse of an intelligent person to have an active mind. :-) It's always a struggle to balance life so that you're doing all that makes your life prosperous. We're off on an adventure, sailing on a tall ship out of Astoria, Oregon on Sunday. ((hugs)), Teresa :-)
ReplyDeleteI still find walking the best destresser... but I do it early when there's no one else about. I do yoga too but don't find it particularly relaxing as I get frustrated by my lack of flexibility! I hope you are having a good weekend. Eating well helps!
ReplyDeleteI’m sorry you’re feeling anxious. Frustrating when you can’t pinpoint the cause, but the world is doing such a good job of throwing horrid stuff about at us all (or people in it are), it’s enough to make the stoutest hearts wobble. I’m wishing peace, calm and tranquility for you, and time just to be and breathe. Xx
ReplyDeleteDefinitely find something happy or funny to read or listen to. I can concur about the breathing comment above. I am a ridiculously shallow breather and breath holder. I find it easier to get upstairs by deliberately doing some proper breathing!
ReplyDeleteWhy I should be deliberately depriving myself of oxygen is a mystery.
Pilates is a help especially if it starts with lying down on the mat. I hope you perk up soon.
Your olives in a souk reminded me of the time I ate raw fresh ravioli in Italy. Had no idea it was supposed to be cooked.
Olives! How very exotic!
ReplyDeleteI understand, very much, that feeling of which you speak...sort of a low-grade dread and uneasiness? I'm familiar. I haven't tried meditation for any great length of time -- I think it has to be a regular practice to be beneficial....like you, moments of peace, quiet and non-interruption are few and far between and I don't think that meditating while driving is a good idea....and being in the car is truly my only haven of peace and quiet most days. I cry in the car, for much the same reason of not having peace and quiet elsewhere. :)
I do heartily recommend 'cosy' books, though....they've done me the absolute world of good and I retreat to my book fort on a very regular basis now. I make no apologies for my literary (or lack thereof) tastes, I read for therapeutic escape so pfft.
wishing you all of the peace and tranquility, my dear....and time to notice the lovely and beautiful things xoxoxo
Insomnia can worsen anxiety. I know, one more thing to worry about... I do find it helps to recognize that I just need more sleep and to ignore the worries.
ReplyDeleteSomeone mentioned deep breaths...I do find that helps. I have a little mantra, if you will, that I use to help me relax and sleep...Calm, Comfortable, Relaxed, Asleep. I take a deep breath and think about one word for a few moments. Exhale. Then deep breath and meditate on the next. Repeat as needed. My friend suggested this and I have been using it for a while. I also tell myself, there’s nothing I need to worry about tonight. It’s true, things do always look brighter in the morning.
I'm so botanically challenged that I didn't even realise that was olives in the photo! I do love eating them though :) I hope you're able to regain your balance soon. xx Susan
ReplyDeleteI hope you feel better soon. One of my favourite comfort reads is 'Miss Pettigrew Lives For A Day' - have you ever read it?
ReplyDeleteWe used to have an olive tree in our garden in Jordan, and cured olives a few times. Good luck with yours!
Well I am clenching, tossing and turning and feeling extremely anxious and down, but I know what it is from and there isn't a darn thing I can do about it. I think you should try meditation, I do it and of course saying that I am not a good example of calm right now. But maybe if I didn't I'd be at the funny farm by this stage. Try it. I can recommend the book 10% Happier, it is funny and makes it all so much easier to understand. Breath my friend, things will even out.
ReplyDeleteOlives, how exciting! I think they are not harvested until later in the year but I might be making this up. A friend of mine used to go to olive harvest in Italy and it was cold.
ReplyDeleteAnxiety is a tough one. We are all different of course but I find that organised "relaxing" activities make me more anxious because they add another thing to list of things to do and do them well. Personally, I find listening to podcasts as bedtime helps. I choose something that is engaging enough to stop my mind from wandering but not so engaging that I can't nod off. Also something short enough that I can find the time stamp when I fell asleep.
I hope you have a lovely week, with less anxiety and a gentle flow of life. xx
P.S. I may have left two comments, not sure, I am now having the same problems that CT experienced earlier last week and comments disappear. Feel free to delete any duplicates
Things that help me minimize my anxiety: Avoiding caffeine. Getting hard cardio exercise several times a week. Drinking lots of water. Doing meditative activities every day, like knitting, crochet, or cross stitch (note: I don't actually meditate). When my anxiety really ramps up, I try to pinpoint the source. If I realize it's hormonal, that makes me feel better about it for some reason. And finally, when the anxiety is acute and I feel on the verge of panic, the 4-7-8 breathing exercise on this page helps https://www.drweil.com/health-wellness/body-mind-spirit/stress-anxiety/breathing-three-exercises/ I hope you figure out what works for you.
ReplyDeleteMaybe we're supposed to feel anxious sometimes...horrid though it is...I find easing off the caffeine important. I can get the jitters if I drink a coke! Distraction works for me sometimes and a good brisk walk works well for levelling out ragged breathing. Frustratingly I can't seem to have a good cry lately even if I really need one. Obviously lots of emotions are getting stuck which isn't good. I notice the feeling strangely when bending down to pick up the washing when hanging it out and also very often at the meal table. Strange but true. It's like a little tug between throat and heart. Weird and not very nice. Maybe I'll try coughing up the feeling and stamping on it! x
ReplyDeleteSo nice to hear someone else has an occupying dog. Ours seems to require endless walking, feeding and protective measures otherwise he eats visitors and the children's soft toys...
ReplyDeleteI feel the same at the moment. I can't seem to shake it and I fear that it is becomming my norm - sigh. I just wanted to say that I find crochet helps. It seems to really calm my inner turmoil down and I do feel better afterwards. The other thing that helps is walking the dog -she makes everything better. I hope you have found some things to help you get through your troubles. x
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