It's been wet at the wetlands. Storms, floods and high tides. Perfect for waders and ducks. Although apparently they did have a bit of trouble landing on that stormy day we had. I tried to take photos with colour in them to start with. But after the duck with the blue bill (how pretty is he?!) I ran out of colourful subjects. I don't mind though, I love these muted colours of winter. All too soon there will be bright colours. I always like to hold on to the end of winter. It's such a nice time to be tucked away at home. Any day now I will have to start work at the allotment and in the garden and all will be busy, busy, busy. But the dormant time is a restful treat.
It's half term here, apparently a different week to the rest of the country, so everywhere is blissfully quiet. And today, blissfully sunny. We ate too many pancakes yesterday, and now I'm trying to impose a "less indulgent" Lent. I have given up sweet things and salty snacks. The first few days will be the trickiest. Although wait until the children find out they've given up crisps.
Everyone around here seems to be in various stages of succumbing to a horrible cold. I'm trying to avoid the germs by shouting, "Don't breathe on me" at regular intervals. Tomorrow I'll break out the garlic. Happily I have lots.
On Monday I inadvertently taught the children to play poker. They were trying to work it out themselves so after a while I stepped in and explained the basics. Before I knew it we were all sat round the table with piles of buttons trying to win, win, win. The sun was shining so I drew the blinds. An hour later when the sun had gone in and it was gloomy and we were all still sat there, some of us (not me) still in our pyjamas I wondered if I'd made an error. I used to be a croupier, and I've seen plenty of misery from gambling. I remember a man who'd never been in a casino before, but who won an unfeasibly large amount from a small stake. And who was convinced it would happen again, so he kept coming back. I heard he lost everything. A man who won £17,000 from a stake of £400. But it wasn't enough to buy the restaurant he wanted, so he came back again and again to try and get to the magic figure. It took him a week, but he lost the lot. A man who lost a seven figure fortune in shops made over a lifetime. I have story after story after story. I dealt roulette to someone who lost £30,000 in under two hours once.
So you will understand my shock at how we were suddenly all sat round playing poker. The biggest boy lost all of his buttons and asked for some more. I ttold him that this is how it starts. Today some buttons, tomorrow you'll be selling the house, the wife and the children. I've lightly banned it now. Have I made it more alluring? Sigh. It's all so complicated isn't it.
It sure is ....................I wish I had never brought in video games when our boy was little. Oh my....so much time wasted trying to save the virtual world.
ReplyDeleteAlthough ....he is now living on his own, with a respectable job and supporting himself. So, I guess we really didn't ruin him.
Your bird photos are just lovely. Soon the birds will be leaving our area. I'm hoping to get back to the bird sanctuary at least one more time before they migrate north.
I love teaching card games to children. As long as it's for buttons I can think of quite a few games we love but for some reason we only know them by rude names so I won't list them here.. Who needs electronic gadgets when you have a pack of cards. Love the photos as always. Enjoy the tranquility of half term. B xx
ReplyDeleteYes! It is all rather complicated, but your cautionary tale is delightful, CJ. I think I laughed when you hoped I would. I saw a daffodil, a pussy willow bush and a pinky flowered tree in bloom today...also v's of geese headed...south? I appreciated seeing them all while anxiously wondering if Winter will yet knock them around. Thanks for posting xx
ReplyDeleteI sure did wonder what your blog post title meant! I know you've told me before how gambling upsets you. I can't imagine the lost lives you saw.. it has obviously touched you deeply. I promise you I won't gamble away my quarters! Love your bird shots. ((hugs)), Teresa :-)
ReplyDeleteYou are such an interesting person CJ. I enjoy your writing and stories so much!
ReplyDeleteStick to Snap, I think!
ReplyDeleteIt is complicated indeed, I work at a very high level in the gambling industry & while I enjoy my job immensely it does trouble my soul at times. Perhaps it's as my boys have grown older. I firmly believe that we teach our children about the consequences of their actions but it's so hard to find a balance. I dislike the amusement arcades at the pier close to us the two pence machines greatly trouble me. It took a while for Mike to understand why & how much they upset me. xx
ReplyDeleteI was married to a compulsive gambler, it was the adrenalin he was addicted to. It was a hideous roller coaster. Our 3 children are all in their late 30s now and I'm pretty sure none have been gripped by the gambling bug, thankfully.
ReplyDeleteA difficult decision - I always wonder about advertising betting on TV
ReplyDeleteOh CJ, you make me laugh despite the serious topic. I am imagining your little gang in a darkened room, competing for buttons.... You could use the occasional poker game as an educational challenge, talking about compulsive behaviour and addiction. It is easier to understand and recognise such behaviours when you experience them yourself, in a safe and controlled manner of course. I am quite certain that the lure of gambling is comparable to any other addictive disorder. I feel a compulsion to visit your wetland centre every time you show us beautiful photos :-) Have a lovely Thursday. x
ReplyDeleteOh my!!! You have certainly started something here haven't you! I am sure that you will keep things under control, buttons are OK! Perhaps once they start to lose their buttons they will realise that it isn't all fun. I would never have imagined you as a croupier by the way, not that I spend any time imagining you in any way you understand just in case you think that is odd! Beautiful photos! xx
ReplyDeleteSorry, but you made me laugh too. I seem to recall my boys going through a gambling stage with buttons or matchsticks but fortunately it didn't last.
ReplyDeleteLovely pictures, including the muted ones. Some of my family were gamblers, but not me, okay when they played for matchsticks but otherwise there was much anguish over the years.
ReplyDeleteFlighty xx
Gorgeous drift of crocuses. There are so many pitfalls to negotiate in growing-up and it's our job as parents to help our kids navigate them (that's how I see it anyway). Teaching them to play poker could be seen as a lesson in life skills and you've spent quality time with them - bonus! I don't think it's an inevitable slide into massive debt. But who knows. It is complicated, you're right, and we're all winging it, aren't we? Enjoy the rest of half term. Ours is next week – yippee. S x
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine what you saw when you were a croupier. It sounds like an interesting job, but there must have been some sad sights. I've never gambled at all, and all I really know about casinos is from watching the movie "Casino" (yikes), but I've known a few people who got into trouble with gambling. I also know someone who worked as a security guard in one of the biggest casinos in Las Vegas and she had some very interesting tales to tell. Most of the seemed to involve um...illicit relations taking place in virtually every part of the building. I'm glad you're teaching your boys to be smart about this. We haven't had much gambling here yet but just yesterday mine asked if they could play a video game in the middle of the afternoon. They've been playing once in a while in the evening with their father and I don't mind that, since he's careful about how much time they spend with it, but I don't want to start having them play whenever they want, especially since I don't care to play with them. I hope you enjoy the rest of the break. We only have a short one, next week, but I really can't wait.
ReplyDeleteYou are a Dark Horse, Mrs. What else have you been in a previous incarnation? My imagination is racing away :o) I know what you mean about the cosiness of winter, but today the sun shone, bees were on the Daphne and a Flutter was sunning himself on the warm bricks of the house and I found my heart singing out loud for spring and summer. As to the gambling I reckon you did it right, let them play for a bit then explain the things to avoid xx
ReplyDeleteHow beautiful are those crocuses and the colour of the flamingoes - stunning. xx
ReplyDeleteI am planning to go to Slimbridge this weekend. Where did you find the crocuses?
ReplyDeleteYou're right, it is complicated but so is life and the more they know the better prepared they will be. I used to play 21 or pontoon with my two during wet afternoons using buttons as tokens. I think the advantages of playing a game together far outweigh any negatives about gambling. And they are learning/improving number skills to boot. Did you hear Peter Scott's daughter talking on the radio the other day about opening the house at Slimbridge to visitors soon. Whenever I see that room with its huge picture window overlooking the lake I fall in love with the vista.
ReplyDeleteI hadn't heard about the house opening to the public, just had a look, it will be brilliant I think. Thanks for letting me know. I was just saying to the biggest boy yesterday how wonderful it must have been to live in that house (it's right next to one of the big hides and looks out over the water where the Bewick's swans like to spend the night). It will be brilliant to have a look round and see the view from there. Can't wait! CJ xx
DeleteHey CJ,
ReplyDeleteI think you either have an addictive personality or you don't. And you are either competitive or not. And those unfortunate people you had dealings with would have gambled at the black jack table, the dogs, the horses, the lottery.... Addiction is a dreadful state of being, and your empathy and not derision for them is quite wonderful. Having said all that, your description if you all poker faced behind closed curtains is brilliant. Hmm yes allotment....
Leanne xx
I can imagine the heartbreak you must've seen. Oh my. It's good for the children though, you can tell them the true stories rather than simply go on in a generic way about the evils of gambling. Talking it out honestly is the best way to approach these things, I think. My father-in-law was a gambler....he ended up homeless at one point and has, thankfully, turned his life back around -- but it did so much damage. Even after all of my years working at the racetrack, I never had the inkling to place bets, or go into the casino. So I'm thankful for that.
ReplyDeleteI'm a bit jealous of the greenery and snowdrops. We have snow, dropping...but it's just not the same. ;) xo
My husband and his brothers loved playing poker when they were in high school and then my husband continued in college. I actually met him in the Outing Club at our university, but it was through playing poker in the office, not actually doing anything outside!
ReplyDeleteOh the stories you could tell!!!!! I am so upset at all the fantasy sports sites online where gambling is at an all time high, you don't even have to leave your house to lose everything. I worn my boys about it all the time, but like you I wonder if I have made it more exciting to them by warning them off.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Meredith
I think your experience and sharing that with your children might give them a sober view on things! Luckily we don't gamble here, a lotto ticket a few times a year and that's it...always feels like a waste of hard earned cash! We are starting our half term this week...we are ready! :) xxx
ReplyDeleteHow strange to have a half term hols which is different from everyone else's! We play poker at home with our kids and take them to the races. It's fine when they lose - that's a lesson in itself; the problem comes when they win. This is when we encourage them to stick to their original betting limit and pocket their winnings. We also end every trip to the races with an analysis of our family's overall losses. Such fun!!! If I ever think they're not getting the message, I will tell them about your time as a croupier. Lovely photos, by the way!
ReplyDeleteI really do enjoy your photos. I hope you find time to put some together in an album, a proper one. not just the digital photobooks -- though I love those too. I think you've done such an excellent job of capturing, seasons, colors and light where you live. They transport me.
ReplyDeleteOn the gambling note. I don't know if it's cultural, but my mother taught my son to play poker (5 card draw) by the time he was 4 but no betting. Both my Mom and Husband have been taking the kid to the ponies (the track) since ... well I was at work and they were on watch, need I say more? He doesn't really care for the track now, and when we've gone the last year (2) with him or so, I have knitting and the kid brings his book. But we have entered the stage where now the cousins play for poker chips (no money). They play for fun.
My mother still gambles pretty regularly but she looks at it like a recreation-- play money. In other words she taught us there is a budget. You go and you play that and if you lose that, that's what you've lost and you play no more. Some people would spend that money on a restaurant dinner or drinks and a movie with friends but Mom liked to "play". Interestingly both my sister and I are very frugal when it comes to gambling. We met Mom and her BFF in Vegas once and the 2 of us opted for a show and then walked around and had some wine outside while Mom had her pal were in old downtown gambling away the inheritance ;) I think that I cannot make my money last the way my mother does? I think I lose too fast so the amount of "recreation": time: cost is not a good ration for me.
I think the story of the man who lost everything is a really good one. All kids can relate to getting caught up in the excitement of something. The true stories of people who cannot walk away is an excellent lesson in the reality of where that excitement can lead.
Sorry for the long comment, it just got me thinking ...
It must have been difficult to watch the clients loosing the money especially when you had seen it so many times before! I'm sure it was a good lesson for the children to learn. I do so enjoy your visits to Slimbridge, it will be so exciting to have the house open to the public and being able to look at the view out of that huge window. Sarah x
ReplyDeleteteaching children moral lessons is a nightmare x perhaps if they were gambling for chocolate buttons they'd be less keen to lose them.... or would it just make them want to win more..........
ReplyDeleteMy eldest and his mates went through a poker phase in their late teens. They had a rule that every penny put into the game had to be matched by a penny put into a charity box. I think that helped curb any potential excess.
ReplyDeleteSuch beautiful photos - your pictures always make me sigh and wish I was there. As for the poker, well, the reality is they were going to learn it anyway. It might be a good thing you were the one that taught them and then sat down and played their first games with them. It might take some of the "forbidden fruit" aspect away from it. Your gambling stories are so sad, and, I fear, quite common. We have a close family member who is a gambling addict and it has been awful to watch. Like any other addiction there's nothing anyone can do to help until the person decides for themselves they need help.
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting / commenting on my blog :) These are lovely photos. Is this Slimbridge or just another wetland? Slimbridge has long been on my 'to visit' list!
ReplyDeleteI hope you manage to ward off the cold and the germs with the garlic. Lovely photos, the crocus look amazing xx
ReplyDeleteI've seen some sights that have made me cringe the few times I have been to a casino. Most disturbing was a young lady sitting at a slot machine that had a couple of bucks on it and she was crying. I thought to myself that she probably just spent her paycheck. But what do I know. Maybe her knickers were in a bind. Just dropping by, I can't even remember which blog I clicked from to here, but I enjoyed your post. Happy Valentine's Day!
ReplyDeleteHmmm. I have a brother who gambled. It's not a pretty story at all and I'm left almost phobic. I've never set foot in a casino, nor am I likely ever to. Perhaps you could put a spin on the stakes and, instead of winning buttons, the losers win chores? I'm sure the prospect of cleaning the bathroom for a month would make the whole thing far less appealing?!!! xx
ReplyDeleteIt's wonderful your infos. Thank you very much
ReplyDeleteYou are the coolest mum ever.
ReplyDelete